Day 17: WIFE!

The Queen of Subtlety and I were talking today on Skype. We were catching up on good old days and having the usual banter, when she said…

do you know i read about all you other friends on your blog and get so jealous
ppffftt…
best friend, this friend, college friend…that friend…uuugh
i want to write a big board and say WIIIFFEEEE!!

I told her she is the only friend of the above mentioned categories to have an entire post on her and multiple mentions across several other posts. And then I thanked her for giving me a topic for today. I said I’d put up a pic of her and put a board saying WIFE! Since I don’t wish to die for the mere reason of having publicised a photo she then would kill me for, because she doesn’t look good in it, I stuck to just putting up a board title – WIFE!

Let me clarify the “Wife”, before any of you have wild imaginations. So, I’m this tomboy I’ve told you about several times. I’m constantly in jeans, T-shirts (or chequered shirts, mostly in blues!) and a pair of running shoes. She takes the word “Queen” and “Princess” quite literally at times and goes to the other extreme of being a completely pretty and mostly hot girl! She hates my boyish attire, and I don’t really care about her’s (pretty or otherwise) 😛 I’m constantly pulling her leg and responding with “No, I won’t/can’t /don’t” to just about everything she says. She tries to shower her love on me (sometimes quite literally in the form of tea, biscuits, curds, and whatnots 🙄 ), with hugs and I wriggle out of it with my classic “Ugh, get off me!” expressions 😀  She says “I love yaaaa” and I go “Yeah OK whatever 🙄 ” She tries to (in jest) be the damsel in distress and I tell her to cut the crap. She is absolutely bonkers about the colour pink and I make it a point to tell her every time just how much I hate pink (aaand that she should cut the crap). She calls me Jack (short for jackass, nothing fancy) and I return the love in titanic proportions by calling her Rose! Despite all these, I love her and will always be there for her, and I do think she loves me too 😉

After a few months of this behavioural exchanges, an ex-colleague (well, all three of us are ex-colleagues now!) said that while we’re supposedly best friends, we totally behave like Husband and Wife, where she is the nagging wife and I’m the no-nonsense husband 😛 😛 😛  And that stuck. To the point that my brother has her number saved in his contacts list as “Mrs Priya” 😛

Hence, the title. And the jealousy 😛 Long distance relationships are tough! I miss the wifey!

Day 16: Go Set A Watchman

This is not a book review. I’m terrible at writing book reviews, so I shall not.

This is about the feeling I was left with when I’d finished the book. And for once, I can’t find the right words to express them.

To Kill A Mocking Bird shall always remain in my Top 5 favourites. The reason I loved TKAMB was because I identified a lot with Scout and loved her. I was also a huge fan of Atticus. But mainly, Scout. The tomboy that she was. The way her brother was her best friend. The way her father was no nonsense, yet loving. The way she was always with boys.

So, when I picked this one up, I was prepared to not like it enough. I had believed the reviews fellow readers gave. I’d played down my expectations and was ready to turn the last page over and think “Just did not do justice to the first one”.

I couldn’t have been more wrong.

I loved Go Set A Watchman for a lot of different reasons, Scout and Atticus being the prime ones. I shall not list them all here because I honestly don’t know how to word those, and I won’t do any justice.

All I know is, I loved the experience of reading this book. I read and re-read some portions because the sheer awesomeness brought tears to my eyes. I sat with a pencil and marked out some really touching parts. I read a certain bit and hugged Pumbaa tight. I typed out a particular bit and texted that to my brother. I thought back to my childhood and smiled fondly. I missed Achan a lot – a LOT. I felt immense gratitude to my parents for bringing me up the way I was brought up. I wanted to curl up inside the book and be at peace ❤

I will always love it for the many pearls of wisdom I picked out and stowed away in a far corner of my mind. I’ll leave you with these…

The Lord never sends you more than you can bear.

This helps me have that bit of extra faith to stop me from giving up…

Sometimes we have to kill a little so we can live.

…and this convinces me that while to err is human, to forgive can also be human; it doesn’t always take divinity.

Because finally,

…every man’s watchman, is his conscience.

Day 1: Getting back to blogging…

…proved mighty challenging for a long time. My last post in here was mid of 2014. Yikes. So, when Swaram posted on FB asking for participation to NaBloPoMo, I jumped at it. A lot of the ‘old timers’, who probably thought I died sometime in the past two years, had signed up. This was my chance. To get back in touch with them, make the come back I had so wanted to for a long time, and have a grand start! Plus, my best friend recently told me she hates me for having a blog that’s more popular than hers. On what counts, I’m clueless. Always feels good to spite her a bit 😛 😛 😛

Only, I’ve had the grandest start! Hospital, nebulisation, IV and X-Ray. Because I’ve been sick for the past 6 days and hacking away to glory. All of me hurts. My insides hurt. Feels like somebody punched me right through my ribs. My fingers shake if I even think of lifting one of those really heavy glasses of water. I am constantly hungry but balk at the sight of food.

But yay – here I am, posting my first post in over two years (last minute panic always works, I tell ya!)  That alone feels good. Plus being in the care of a loving heart.

This has got to qualify for a post, because I cannot type anymore. I think I’ve said enough and more here about my threshold for pain…and where the IV needle feasted on my left arm for a few hours today – hurts!

That’s for now, folks. Have some serious coughing to get back to!

Has to be the weirdest tag ever!

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
“Damn! Nalla kani…which means the day’s gonna be bad!” 😀

2. How much cash do you have in your wallet right now?
Rs 2.50…and an electricity bill for 500! 😀

3. What’s a word that rhymes with DOOR?
Bore…that’s what tags are! 😀

4. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?
I always delete miss calls from my phone…(I get those more than calls because I’m never near my ‘mobile’ phone) 😀

5. What is your favorite ring tone on your phone?
Kill Bill

6. What are you wearing right now?
T-shirt and skirt.

7. Do you label yourself?
Oh yea…am my favourite 😉

8. Name the brand of the shoes you’re currently own?
Nike

9. Bright or Dark Room?
Medium 😉

10. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you?
Happy (she just found a job!)

11. What does your watch look like?
Duh! It looks like a watch!

12. What were you doing at midnight last night?
Sleeping 🙂

13.What did your last text message you received on your cell say?
“Haha i didnt even enquire. Wait by even ill let you know whether i’ve done it”

14. What’s a word that you say a lot?
LOL

15. Who told you he/she loved you last?(please exclude spouse , family, children)
An anonymous sms! don’t know who the sender is!

16. Last furry thing you touched?
My hair…when I went to Chennai, my usually smooth hair became furry!! I  blame the coastal climate! 😀

17. Favourite age you have been so far?
7 and 8 — at Guruvayur!

18.  What was the last thing you said to someone?
“Njaan Facebook-il UNO kalikkuaa” 😀 (means, I’m playing UNO on Facebook)

19. The last song you listened to?
Ikhtara — from Wake Up Sid!

20. Where did you live in 1987?
Thiruvananthapuram (was too young to venture out alone — I was 3.)

21. Are you jealous of anyone?
Naah!

22. Is anyone jealous of you?
Of course! Who wouldn’t be? I’m the most perfect anyone can be 😀

23. Name three things that you have on you at all times?
Bindi, dress and watch

24. What’s your favourite town/city?
Thiruvananthapuram!

25. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it?
Last July — to my dad and mom — just saying I love them a looooot and that they’re the best parents ever.

26. Can you change the oil on a car?
Depends on where the oil is 😀 😀

27. Your first love/big crush: what is the last thing you heard about him/her?
first big crush: is in the USA (currently in india on vacation);
first love: am not quite sure which that was; think i should play safe and say I’m married to him 😉 😀 😀

28. Does anything hurt on your body right now?
Nope! But it will, soon! Am gonna pierce my nose 😀

29. What is your current desktop picture?
Me n the husband 🙂

30. Have you been burnt by love?
Yep — whenever I cook for the husband! 😀

And here goes: Verbivore, Ramya, Vimmu, Mahak and Smita

P.S.: Edited after Reema commented: You’re tagged too, girl! 😛

just a tumbler of water

It isn’t often you feel like a potential murderer. Well, today seems to be one of those strangely different, out-of-the-ordinary days!

When I read murder stories, I always marvel (in the most negative way) at the ease with which people plan to and successfully murder someone; similarly with movies. But in those cases, there’s always the consolation that it’s not for real. The shock is when such reports come in the news! And I just sit around wondering “How can a person ‘kill’ someone!?” And for someone like me who refuses to kill even an ant, it’s the biggest mystery. So, when today, I was the one scheming and planning, the shock knew no boundaries!

It’s been sometime now, that I have been contemplating on a murder. And every passing day makes me more and more determined to commit this one. I know it takes one hell of a stone-heart to even think of something like this — but I’m sure I want to do it — yes, you read it right: I want to do it.

So, now you must be wondering why the hell I’m writing about in a public forum. I do not intent to murder and act like a saint. I am totally willing to accept the consequences. I’m doing this only because my object of ‘affection’ here does not deserve to live. If I allow it to, I’ll be responsible for the wreck of two other lives. The love that existed all along will be forgotten: slowly, but steadily. And a day will come when these two lives will be totally dispensable for the other. I cannot allow for that. Better that this one dies.

I opened a Google window and started typing “how to murder a” and immediately the following options popped up:

• how to murder a man (it’s not a man I want to murder)
• how to murder and get away with it (not my intention; you wouldn’t be reading this if it were!)
• how to murder a millionaire (why’d anyone wanna kill a millionaire unless you are due to receive all he’s got!?)
• how to murder a rich uncle (if he has no kids and loves you the most, fine; else, isn’t it more sensible to be his fav nephew/niece?)
• how to murder a and not get caught (again, i repeat, not my intention!)

Well, the option I was looking for was clearly not available. I discussed with a few close friends
— and finally decided that it should be a death-by-water! After all, most people wish to have a sip of water before they die!

Now I know how easy it is to kill. All it takes is some amount of hatred, some amount of despair and a huge amount of determination and reckless disregard for all value — monetary, moral and emotional! In my case, I’ll need just one more thing: a tumbler of water.

Once I’m done, and this post is crawled over by the search engine, Google will add one more item to its current list of “how to murder a”. It’ll have an option for “how to murder a television”!

Carrot-top marries Brinjal-head ;)

Quite a shocker, though!

I always thought blondes were just picturised as dumb — seems they are pretty unlucky too! 😀 Poor thing…after a 67-year-long wait, she gets ditched!

Guess some guys love being strung from the little finger of the girl. 😉 Or maybe it was the money…it being recession and all. US being the worst hit, am sure he was actually being sensible for once. Why else would Archie marry Veronica? Betty was always the better one — sugar and spice and all things nice.

Now, wonder if it’s just a teaser…to bring people back into the lives of Archie and his gang.

I remember how crazy I was about the whole Archie business. I remember telling my mom that someday I’ll make lots of money, babysitting someone’s kid. I loved ‘chocolate sundaes’ just because the gang always had them at Pops’. But I never had them for real until years later 😀

I used to compare most girls between Veronica and Betty: and always ended up having more veronicas–because none of my friends/acquaintances knitted sweaters or cooked surprise dinners or baby-sat for a couple in the next street 😀

‘You’re worse than Reggie” or “Moose is more intelligent” were oft quoted phrases to male classmates. Some of them wondered if these were new abuses 😀 (Like the guy who thought toching a girl makes him pregnant 😉 )

...but looks like he finally did decide! 😀

I longed to eat hamburgers the way Jughead did. Finally, when the first pizza-hamburger shop opened in Trivandrum, I rushed to get one for myself. Sadly, I realised it didn’t fit into my mouth! Well, after all these years, I still can’t manage to eat one without messing up my face, dress and my immediate surroundings! 😀

I always thought Midge was a beauty! The way Moose hovers around her like this protective shield was one of the sweetest things. The one funniest thing I remember about Archie n Moose is when Moose decided to punch Archie and he says “Count till 10 before you hit me, Moose.” At the count of monte cristo 7, Moose gets stuck — and Archie escapes 😉

And of course, Big Ethel! I always thought a certain friend of my best friend looked exactly like Big Ethel. And we both used to laugh our guts out whenever we see either Big Ethel or Lekha. 😀

What will Reggie do now? He always had a thing for the brunette. Mr Lodge must have had a siezure when he heard the news! Or maybe he’s dead — he was quite old then itself 😀 Or, maybe he died when he heard the news! He despised the ‘boy’ so much!

And am sure Jughead must be pissed: he never quite liked Veronica. Well, he never quite liked any female other than female-hamburgers, if there were any…but between these two, am sure he’d have preferred his best friend kneeling down in front of Betty. 😉

Waiting to grab the first issue of the latest season in August! 😀

yey! happiness is happening!!

Very little had been happening in life to be ecstatic about — of course, I’m generally a happy soul, so it takes unbelievably lovely news/things that’ll make me feel like I’m feeling now — about to burst with happiness!

What do you think could be better than a mail (comment, in this case) from a friend you’d thought you ‘lost’, saying:

I need yu beside me no matter what(I/Yu) do, for I kno il never find another yu…..;)

Yey!!

Jaya, I  just cannot tell you how happy I am….how happy those words have made me. I had almost given up on being forgiven…and while I never expressed it much, it used to tear me apart that you’d lost that ‘connection’ with me! But now! Wow! I…I love  you! 😀 I am just so happy! 🙂

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For all you people who gave me consolation, chided me and assured me “it’ll all be ok” when I wept about what it takes to lose a friend…here’s what she said…here’s how she forgave 🙂 Yey!

Its not everyday that you get a friend who thinks like you, acts like you, eats like you, sleeps like you, talks like you and what not like you… But when you know the other person like yourself, its hard to be angry with the other person for long. But when you do get angry, its even harder to get over it…. Cos, for my wedding I dint really care about the 1000-2000 ppl who came ter (I din even kno half of them). And above all my friends it was yu who mattered the most, cos it wos yu who i told first when I went bonkers for the guy, yu wer te first person to kno when the dates go t fixed for te wedding and yu wer te first person I expected to be at my home b4 te weddin. ……….…………………But I also know that I was tooo rude to you even though you tried a lot of ways to make it up. But I guess wot tey say bt time healing is true  Cos I just wnt to say I am all over it now and I am reelly SORRY for being so rude. Im taking back all tat I said n yur still my best friend.
Cos like te song goes,’I need yu beside me no matter what(I/Yu) do, for I kno il never find another yu…..;)I kno im bein a lil mushy here, but I don care.Lov yu loads diiii….;);)

I’m just so so soooo happy today, that I could even be convinced into liking Bangalore! 😉

Yey! 😀

Elections. Whose choice is it?

“Why vote you say? The youth make up a majority of our billion plus population, but how many of us vote? We complain about bad roads, corrupt politicians and unfair reservations, but what are WE doing about it? The first step to resolve these  issues is to vote.” – This is what jaagore.com says.

These statements by jaagore.com sounded lame to me! 😡 Haven’t we been voting for many years now? Is not corruption still rampant? Unfair reservations keep sifting out deserving candidates everywhere! And bad roads…well, gone today (when elections loom ahead); back tomorrow (when somebody gets the throne!). So, is voting the ultimate solution to these problems? Bah! I don’t think so.

Again, is voting a right or a duty? Nowhere does it say in our constitution that voting is a duty; it’s a right. That gives one the freedom to (or not to) abstain from it. Most people seem to think that voting is a duty, and if not followed, can lead to legal issues! Such people need to be informed that voting is a right, not an obligation/duty. They should do it after logical reasoning — and not emotional thinking: like succumbing to petty attractions (like an offers of money/property/job)!

Now, irrespective of it being a right or a duty, how much choice does a voter get? In an election where none of the candidates represent the voter or his interests, what should the voter do? Is there an option of voting for “None”? No!  So, the ideal/moral thing to do would be not to vote. If you ask me, in such a case, by not voting, I’m declaring that I do not find any of the candidates acceptable. 😐

They say the Rule 49-O allows this. The rule says: If an elector, after his electoral roll number has been duly entered in the register of voters in Form-17A and has put his signature or thumb impression thereon as required under sub-rule (1) of rule 49L, decided not to record his vote, a remark to this effect shall be made against the said entry in Form 17A by the presiding officer and the signature or thumb impression of the elector shall be obtained against such remark.

Now, the ballot paper / voting machine has only a list of candidate names. So one who wishes to make use of this Rule will have to inform the presiding officer at the election both — so where is the secrecy!? And taking into account the number of goondas who loiter around in the area, one can only imagine what safety one would have if such a thing is informed! So, that ‘option’ becomes a joke! 😕

The e-mail doing the rounds — claiming that if the ’49-O’ votes more than those of the winning candidate, then that poll will be canceled and will have to be re-polled, and that the contestants will be banned and cannot contest the re-polling for their life time — is apparently a hoax! 🙄 Personally I feel a rule like this would mean a lot of national waste: considering the amount of public funds spent to conduct an election!

And what makes a person eligible to be a candidate? Why, even the post of a “stenographer” requires some minimum qualifications for a person to get that job. But any Tom, Dick and Harry can get into politics — and then lead the nation! I don’t say all leaders should be MBA graduates, but the least one can expect are candidates who have a ‘clean’ portfolio! Is that asking too much!? Along with the right to vote, people should be given the right to demand certain “minimum qualifications” of the contesting candidate!

Apparently, it’s the responsibility of eligible voters to enroll the names of eligible contestants. So, if people hate all the politicians, who is to blame for the state of affairs? The politicians or the citizens ? But for quite a few years, have the young voters had a choice, really? I mean, politics has become a family business mostly…and everyone knows who’ll contest for the next 10 years! (OK, I’m exaggerating; but even if a new comer contests, people now seem to have no faith. They still go on voting for ‘those who’ve been in the business for a while’ now.) What I mean to say is…the ‘chance’ to enroll new contestants at the grassroots level seems to be a distant dream!

Hehe…we seem to need a fresh start! Like.. lay offs in politics! Send all the existing ones home — with a nominal pension, of course! — and start afresh with younger, competent people. Who? Well, I don’t know! 😳

“The difference between a democracy and a dictatorship is that in a democracy you vote first and take orders later; in a dictatorship you don’t have to waste your time voting“, said Charles Bukowski.

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I agree with him. I will not vote! 😀

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Now that you know what I think, let me know what you think! Tell! Tell! Tell! 😀

all it takes to lose…

Doesn’t matter how many years you’ve been friends for; doesn’t matter how many times you’ve stood by each other; doesn’t matter how many jokes you’ve shared; doesn’t matter how long you’ve been there for each other; doesn’t matter how many jokes you’ve shared; doesn’t matter how many pranks you’ve played; doesn’t matter how many, many times you’ve told each other “You’re my best buddy!”. All it takes to lose a friend is not to attend her wedding!

I learnt this the hard way. May none of you ever!

P.S.:

My apologies! You’re still my best friend! 😥

Higgs Boson, where art thou ?

14 years of preparation. 10 billion Swiss francs. A 5-billion-pound Large Hadron Collider. A 27-km tunnel, 80 metres into the earth. Sub-atomic particles which will collide at close to the speed of light. Recreation of a bang that happened some 15 billion years ago — all this to find and arrest the Higgs Boson. 😀

Higgs Boson, it was reported, once caught and subjected to heartless interrogation, would clarify how otherwise mass-less elementary particles manage to create mass in matter. Higgs Boson would also spill the beans on the difference between the mass-less photon and the relatively massive W and Z bosons (what/whoever they are!). Higgs will probably also give in and tell us why gravity exists!! I personally feel that Newton’s lineage should press charges against Higgs: for having kept gravity a secret and causing the famous apple to fall on that famous head — Higgs has no idea how many students have been struggling for ages and cursing Newton (and his lineage), since then! 😛

Anyway, on 10 September 2008, sub-atomic particles (who apparently claimed to know and could recognise Higgs) were sent out in search of him into an LHC tunnel. But within a short 10-day period, Higgs  Boson’s sub-atomic friends created chaos within LHC!

The court, which had been ready to meet in a month’s time for the verdict, was adjourned. The sub-atomic friends will have to be subjected to intense counselling and made to understand the need to be disciplined and find out Higgs Boson’s hiding place — psychologists say they will need time till September 2009 to achieve this!

Can you see? Can you? Can you? 😀

Higgs Boson, notoriously known as the God Particle, has been in hiding since time immemorial. The secrets it hold are believed to be in tremendous demand by the scientific world. Long, long ago, Higgs Boson apparently set off a bomb somehow: the big bang that resulted out of the explosion is believed to be the source of all (good and bad) that has been happening in the world to this day! Leaving the ‘good’ aside, this Higgs Boson is being made accountable for all the ‘bad’. Well, who knows, if the good outweighs the bad, Higgs Boson may even become another ‘big bang celebrity’!