the day I almost thought my last thought!

August 14: The day I almost thought my last thought! The day I thought about a lot of things in such a rush, for fear of never being able to think about anything, anymore! The day I thought I was dying. Gosh, I guess I’ll never forget this day! 😀

August 13: Went out with my brother to Garuda Mall, Bangalore. Walked around for a looong time…in and out of shops, without buying anything, driving the sales-people crazy, until I got myself a sprained muscle on my left shoulder. The pain kept bothering me, but I gave no heed. Cooked dinner, made idly batter for the next day (one helluva job, I tell you!), saw part of some incorrigible movie, quarreled with the husband for some silly reason (I blame the pain for the irritation) and went off to sleep.

August 14 (again!?): Woke up with the pain again. Made breakfast, by the end of which I realised I couldn’t adjust myself to a lot of positions, thanks to the pain that sent me buckling every now and then! Had loads of office work, which I managed to (grossly uncomfortably) complete by 4.30. Meanwhile, I checked the Internet for symptoms of appendicitis, kidney stone, tumor and what not. The only disease I didn’t check for was swine flu, thanks to the half dozen mails that keep pouring in everyday on the subject.

I was in pain — breathing in and out, sneezing (mere thoughts of sneezing, even), burping, laughing, walking, lying, sitting, standing, crying, yawning…just about everything I’ve learnt to do in life hurt like hell!! Till about 5.00, I managed to sit around with my brother, trying to laugh at myself and my antics, without moving my belly. Then I retreated to my room, decided to lie down. And oh God…in the next 10 minutes, the pain shot up so bad, I hardly had any voice. My brother, right in the next room, couldn’t hear me whimpering, crying out in pain, calling out for mom!

In the next hour, the husband, back from office, came in with my brother to see me in tears, writhing on the bed. And of all the things in the world, he asks to no one in particular “Is she really in pain or is she just trying to pull my leg?”  I’d been pitying myself for almost an hour, taking in the sad fact that I would be alone and in pain when I die…with no one to even share my will and last wishes…when he asks if I were pulling his leg! Bah! (Well, in his defense, I must admit that when I called him up, asking him to come home fast, I was laughing and trying to keep the pain at bay.)

Anyway, the next 2 hours flew by. I was almost carried to the car, taken to a hospital (where I managed to crawl up the stairs and settle myself, screaming and moaning and whimpering) which turned out to be just for preganant women, turned out, again carried to the car, rushed to another hospital, given an injection and sent for an ultrasound abdomen scanning. Turns out, it was just a plain old muscle spasm. Anyway, the doctors doubted a possible infection in the kidney and prescribed a urine test. After 4 full glasses of water, hopeless PJs, incessant laughter (which still hurt, by the way) and relief over being “alive”, we left the hospital, leaving the receptionist and her colleague laughing over my adamant bladder that refused to refill itself. 😀

There’s slight pain, still. A deep breath / or a sharp one before a sneeze, still hurts. But it feels great to be alive! 🙂 It feels great to not be in pain! It feels great to be able to blog about it…and laugh about the pathetic condition I had been in yesterday! The husband says I’m like a car with perpetual ‘patch work’ — it’s either backpain, or memory loss, or headache, or some sort of problem! Health seems to be the only blessing I was never endowed with in abundance by God! 😀

But whatever! Yey! I am alive 🙂

P.S.: My idea of adopting a child has been reinforced since yesterday’s incident 😀 😀 I just cannot take any pain. 😀

Memories of a 5th grader

Before you start reading this post, please scroll down and read the disclaimer (it’s in italics, grey) in the post right below this one 😀 (I’m sure you’ll have to read it for quite sometime from now on!)

My “online time” is lesser than the state’s monthly ration allowances! The maximum I get to do these days is open Gmail, open Orkut, open WP and then log out before I can do anything useful! I was succumbing to unknown mighty forces that are against me being online — and had almost become used to it…until yesterday!

A chat box opened up in my Gmail and asked “Remember me?” After initial moments of 😯 , I was thrilled! It was an old, old, ooooooold classmate. We shared a class, a bench and our friendship in 5th Std! And then we’d lost touch. A few years ago, when I’d started my Orkut account, I’d searched for her, but wasn’t lucky. And now, here she was.

We had a few long gaps amidst one liners…14 years is a long long time — and if you think there’d be lots of stuff to catch up on when you meet such an old friend, let me tell you, there’s none! 😀 We had no clue what to talk about…other than one-liner replies to “Where are you these days?” and “What you up to?” and the like. And well, if you think there’d be nothing to talk about after the first round of such awkwardness, let me tell you, you’re wrong! Hehe…we launched into a trail of “Do you remember whens” 😉 . Oh God! It was the best catching-up I had had in a long time!

We discussed kho-kho games and falling-downs (I hated that game and would always end up bruised; so would she); we discussed about those irate teachers and our incessant chatting (apparently, once we both were asked to sit at two different seats, well away from each other because of our non-stop talking — and I started crying; being the true friend she was, she started off too! 😀 ); we discussed a few horrid male classmates with whom we’d always get into a quarrel — and I’d go marching to the staff room to complain, bring back a loud-voiced Sir and get them guys shouted at! 😉

We literally laughed out loud discussing a classmate who never used to touch a girl, for fear of him getting pregnant! Ever if his finger brushed against a girl’s by mistake, he’d bring out his towel and rub “it” all off vehemently! (He’s with Infosys now, though I don’t know why I’ve mentioned it here 😀 ). Then there was this Anti-Love Association we’d started — 4 of us friends — against “love” (I still don’t think I was a voluntary member of that 😉 )! Hehe…we used to snoop around, find all sorts of “couples” on campus — well, there was nothing much we fifth grades could do about it — bitch about them majorly! 😛 There was also another secret society we were members of — but of what, we now got no clue! I only remember tiny visiting cards and a symbol on our thumbs (used to make it by dabbing ink onto the bottom of a sketch-pen and pressing it on out thumbs!)

Apparently, once those horrid male classmates pushed her off the bench and she landed “thud” on the floor, right with her bruise facing the floor. Well, we had our revenges too…we used to stone those guys during our every single badminton sessions! — psssttt…and get stoned by them too! 😦

The funniest of all was the recollection of her and myself on stage once — hair all done up and tied with colourful ribbons that matched our dresses — singing away to glory!! 😀

Anyway, it was a rather playful walk down memory lane…becoming a 5th grader again, even if for a few minutes, was awesome — and I enjoyed it so very thoroughly! 🙂 Now, that once-upon-a-time little girl is a stunningly beautiful woman! I was shocked when I saw her picture — and gaped for quite a while! 🙂

I’m so glad we’re back in touch. 14 years of fun we’d missed. Welcome back, Indu! 🙂

Tag me unromantic!

I’ve been having a terrible writer’s block for more than a week now. And in such situations, friends — disguised as ‘taggers’ — become a saviour. And, it was in such a time that this tag came my way. But Vimal, my saviour in disguise, I’m gonna kick you for tagging me this one! 😀 . Though this is quite an ‘interesting’ tag, I am not at all the one to do it! But well, of the two rules below, one says I have no escape!

RULE #1 People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

RULE #2 Tag 6 people to do this quiz and they cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by, cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by, and must continue this game by sending it to other people.

So here goes!

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
   My definition of ‘betrayal’ is gravely different from the normal person’s. So, I tend to ignore this question (for fear of kicking up deadly debates in the blogville 😉 ).
2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
   My dream would come true the day someone creates my clone! 🙂
3. Whose butt would you like to kick?
   Vimal‘s 😀 !!!!!!!
4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
   Go off to Austria in a hot-air balloon!
5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?
   I would’ve, definitely, if I were a lesbian 😀 !
6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
   Both are equally so! (Existence of one without the other is horrid.)
7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
   Till around 11:30 p.m. Then I’ll sleep off!
8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
   Use some ‘de-attacher’, de-attach him and promptly attach him to me 😀
9. If you like to act with someone, who will it be? Your gf/bf or an actress/actor?
   Madhavan! Oh…I’d give anything to see him up close! (The guy I acted with once, became my bf later. I would love to see if the same would happen if I act with Madhavan! 😉 )
10. What takes you down the fastest?
    A lift — and if it’s one with no individuality, faster still.
11. How would you see yourself in ten years’ time?
    With my eyes, of course!
12. What’s your fear?
    I fear I’ll regret my decision.
13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
    A handsome singer, a tee-totaller and a good friend 😉 (now waiting to get kicked too).
14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
    I’d much rather be married and still rich! 😛
15. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?
    Sneeze!(I have some damn nasal problem.)
16. Would you give all in a relationship?
    Everything, but my individuality.
17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
    The lighter one 😀 Ok…jokes apart, why the hell can’t I have both? Only one? In that case, the one with the better parents! 😀
18. Would you forgive and forget, no matter how horrible a thing that special someone has done?
    Yes! I am blessed with a bad memory. People can vouch for that!
19. If you get to go back in time and fall in love all over again, would it still be with the same person? (Original question: What are your three most important expectations in love?)
    Ummmmmmm…can the same person have different parents? No? Then, NO !
20. List 6 people to tag:
    Reema, Sakhi, Mahak, Xylene, Harish and Arvind

those smells…those songs…and…… those memories!

Ever wondered how the most inconspicuous things in life bring you memories that matter most? Like a smell that reminds you of a certain day or place…a song that pull you into a time machine and shoots you back into the past…a scene from an ad/film that reminds you of a similar day/situation in your life…i dont know how many of you experience this and how often…but i do…almost everyday, all the time! Sometimes i wonder if i have a future at all 😀 …i always seem to be flitting between the past and the present 😉 .

The other day, i heard the song “agar thum mil jaaye” from the film Zeher, i was so reminded of the concrete paving at the park where i used to spend time with 2 lovely friends of mine in Dombivali, Mumbai. We used to go there every evening around 6…and just sit there staring at stars, guys and the love-bit couples who always used to find seats behind the board that said ” ” (yes, you guessed right; it was in hindi, which I don’t really think i read right)…

Then there is the feeling of getting wet in the rain…no matter where I am, i’m always reminded of GOA, PVR and Krishh…that day we were at the beach–my bro, ma best friend and my sunshine–we had so much fun till it started pouring heavily, and we had to rush off to PVR for cover. Wet from head to toe, we sat inside that freezing theatre, watching the worst film ever made!

The sight of the “next” electronics store reminds me of a broken foot and 100s of Mumbai’s foot-over-bridge steps that i crossed with it!! Oh the fun we had that June!

Tin Tin comics remind me of an Alliance Francais classmate whom i hated!

Barista reminds me of a slapstick joke that made a friend spurt out a mouthful of coffee over the clean walls there!

Odonil reminds me of a long-back crush!!!

All films that have babies and adoring parents remind me of Amma and Achan…and i wanna go home…to kerala…trivandrum…ooooh…i so miss them…i soo love them too!!!

Best of all: there is this weird smell (not a stink)…i dont know how to describe it (wish i could attach it to this post)…know what it reminds me of?? hehehe…you wouldn’t guess! it reminds me so much of my playschool bathroom!!! Hahaha…no, i repeat this isnt a stink. It was this squeaky clean place (where i used to spend most of my time to stay away from ABCs and I23s…)

And posts like this reminds me of my Alzheimers…i dont know what i’m writing…i logged in to write something i really wanted to let you all know…but it’s totally slipped ma mind…am not in the best of ma senses, i guess…missing home beeeeeg time….sorry for a bad time, guys! Imagine you never read this, please! 😀

P.S: This post will be edited and re-posted when the “senses” are bac 😀

There’s more….coming soon!